I’m thinking I’ll be single for the rest of my life. 

My wife passed away a little over seven years ago. I’m 70 years old now, and although I feel pretty good, I have had some health issues the past few years. An eye stroke left me blind in one eye. I had to have my aortic valve replaced last year. This year I had shoulder reconstruction surgery. I have an assortment of scars from the surgeries, enough so that I look like I was attacked by a Grizzly bear. 

For the most part, I am fine living alone. I can’t say I feel particularly lonely. Most of the time. But every now and then I think it would be nice to have someone – what’s the word I’m looking for? – special? to spend some time with. 

It’s not that I’m not ready to get married again. I just don’t think I’m ever going to want to. I don’t want to lead anyone on, give them the false impression that in time I’ll be ready. 

I don’t like the idea of having to answer to anyone. If I want to go on a trip, I want to go without having to discuss it or make plans or see to it that someone else is enjoying it. I just want to go. Alone. 

So, needless to say, my social life is pretty much zero. What woman would want to waste time on a one-eyed fat man who is not willing to make a commitment?

And even if I did, what do I have to offer? I have a reasonably comfortable retirement. What I have, including my house, will be passed on to my daughter and grandchildren. If I were to remarry, anything I would leave for my new wife would be that much less for them. I’m not going to do that. 

And I doubt that I could at my age and with my health issues be able to obtain another life insurance policy that would leave her with much. 

At this stage of my life, how many good years do I have left before a new wife would have to become my caregiver? My widow? Or vice-versa?

So, as I see it, I need to find a healthy younger woman who is financially independent, ok with me being me, and ok with us being friends. 

I’m thinking I’ll be single for the rest of my life. 

P.S. I suppose if she is a multi-billionaire I could reconsider my position on marriage. 

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